The thing that hit me the hardest about this whole story was your footnote. I too am in a long term relationship with someone who does not appreciate anger. I‘ve done a lot of work on this in therapy with said person. What it came down to was “anger is good and real and important.” And it is. People who are conflict averse obviously hate it. I think your “what the fuck is wrong with you” could not have been more perfect. If only I had that nerve. Well the fuck done! And instead of you feeling vaguely guilty about your anger maybe your boyfriend, lovely though he is, should feel vaguely guilty for shaming you just because he is uncomfortable. Um, not your fault.
True… I know the feeling
The thing that hit me the hardest about this whole story was your footnote. I too am in a long term relationship with someone who does not appreciate anger. I‘ve done a lot of work on this in therapy with said person. What it came down to was “anger is good and real and important.” And it is. People who are conflict averse obviously hate it. I think your “what the fuck is wrong with you” could not have been more perfect. If only I had that nerve. Well the fuck done! And instead of you feeling vaguely guilty about your anger maybe your boyfriend, lovely though he is, should feel vaguely guilty for shaming you just because he is uncomfortable. Um, not your fault.