Three Short Stories About Sugar

In decreasing order of sweetness

Next week I will do a second interview with my friend Y, where he will be answering remaining questions people (people including me) had after his first interview.

In the meantime I offer:

Three Short Stories About Sugar in Decreasing Order of Sweetness

My sweetest sugar story takes place in the mid 1970s.

The Berkshire Museum in Pittsfield, Massachusetts is constructed of yellowish brick, and on Pittsfield’s main drag, South Street, which, if you’re patient, becomes North Street.

The museum was founded by Zenas Crane Jr., of Crane Paper, which is also in Berkshire County and makes nice note cards in addition to paper for currency.

Ol’ Zenas Crane wanted tiny Berkshire County to have a real citified museum, so he put actual famous paintings in it, like by Gilbert Stuart and Albert Bierstadt. The museum also has a fur suit that Matthew Henson wore while exploring the North Pole, and a genuine mummy. When King Tut came to New York in 1978 and I wanted to go, I was told no because hey, we had a perfectly fine mummy right here in Pittsfield.

One cannot deny that for a county of 100,000 people, this was a respectable mummy, with well-preserved toes.

Just before Christmas 1974, my kindergarten class went to the Berkshire Museum for a world-class gingerbread house exhibit. I was both blown away by this exhibit and frustrated by it. How could there be so many amazing gingerbread houses just sitting out that no one (me) was allowed to eat? It was like going to the beach and not going swimming, or getting a brand new kite and keeping it in the box. It was like not being able to feel the mummy’s toes, except that the mummy was encased in a glass box and this was never going to happen. These gingerbread houses were not in glass boxes. So I bent down and gave one of them a hearty lick.